Fruzzetti’s new book helps couples in conflict resolve relationship stress
Alan Fruzzetti, associate professor of psychology and director of the Dialectical Behavior Therapy and Research Program, offers strategies to turn around troubled relationships in his book, The High Conflict Couple, published this month.
The techniques are grounded in dialectic behavior therapy and research. Fruzzetti’s research examines the effects of severe behavior problems including family violence, depression, or suicide on couples and families, and on developing effective programs to help couples and families.
“Couples in conflict can become so engaged in anger and blame that they may forget what sparked an argument,” Fruzzetti said. “Individuals often want closeness and intimacy but may lack skills to communicate effectively. Their partner feels criticized and reacts accordingly. Couples may lash out at each other during these periods of increasing escalation.”
It may be difficult to disengage from polarizing anger once an argument has started. Fruzzetti’s strategies motivate couples to prioritize resolving relationship conflict. Then, he offers specific tools to communicate need and vulnerabilities, allowing the other individual to express similar feelings. Practice exercises are incorporated in each chapter to build the skills that encourage intimacy.
“There is a relationship between holiday stress and increased conflict in troubled couples and families,” Fruzzetti said. “Only 10 percent of high conflict couples seek counseling, and those who participate in therapy describe themselves as miserable for as much as five years.”
The principles outlined in the book are also applicable to families in distress, gay and lesbian couples, and the workplace.
Zanny Marsh, public relations director, can be reached at zmarsh@unr.edu.
